what's your max?
i was on the phone last night with a long-lost-but-never-completely-out-of-the-picture friend. as we were lamenting our love-lives, or lack thereof, i mentioned to my friend that as we spoke, max, my dog, was licking my leg, the most action i had gotten in awhile. my friend replied, "maybe i need a 'max'".
EVERYONE needs a max! but not in the way that he was jokingly referring to.
a few years ago, and i don't know why it took me so long to pinpoint this, i realized that there are two things in my life that if i don't have at all times, i am unhappy. that is not to say that these two things are all i need to be completely happy, but that is to say that without them, i can quickly become completely miserable.
1. i must have a dog. preferably two.
2. i must know when i am going to be in paris next.
you might think that is strange, you might think it is simple. but it is true.
"but jeanie," you say, "this really isn't all that helpful to me. i don't like/have time for/am allowed to have dogs, and i have no desire to go to paris because it is full of french people who are rude/smelly/hate americans."
"but, you big doofus," i reply to you, "i am not actually suggesting that EVERYONE should have a dog. and you obviously have never been to paris if that is really what you think, so stop talking out of your derriere."
what i am saying is that i always have:
1. something that makes me smile every single day, in the present, and
2. something special to look forward to, that i do just for myself.
for example: someone hurt my feelings today. like i haven't been hurt in quite some time. and i'm still hurt. but when i got home from running some errands today and was still feeling badly, max was there at the door to do his "happy dance" for me. this is a special dance he does only for people he really loves, and you cannot witness it without cracking up. timmy, my other yorkie, was also at the door. timmy is a bit more dignified. he would not lick anyone to save his life. but when i come home, i say "air kisses, timmy!" and he stands on his hind legs and snuffs at me while i bend over so we are nose to nose. he rarely does this for anyone, but he does it for me every day.
so what is your max? what or who do you have, something you can absolutely count on, to make you smile every single day? it is really important. if you don't have a max, you must get one. a max takes care of your instant gratification needs.
what is your paris? paris to me is not just the 12 days that i will be spending there at the end of this month. paris is my sanctuary. even when i am not there, as long as i know when i will be there, as long as i have it to look forward to, i can escape to it any time i want. i sit here in baltimore with my feelings hurt, but in 14 days i will be in paris, and knowing that, visualizing that, makes me feel better. it makes me feel better on the good days, too.
but as i sit here a little longer, it is obvious to me that there is a third thing that if i had to go a single day without i would be an absolute wretch. since that one person has hurt me (and i am sure that it was done without malice, and we will talk and get through it and be fine, just not today), i have had an invitation to the governor's inaugaral ball with one friend; a few moments in person with another friend who let me vent and bought me a beer, with whom i have plans tomorrow night with another friend who is moving back to town; an email and a call from another friend to make plans for sunday; a call from another friend to invite me to watch the game on saturday; and a call from another friend, who i will be seeing monday (and who has been going through some stuff lately that makes my drama look like candy-coated sunshine), because i said at the end of an email tonight that i was a bit depressed.
wow. WOW. i was going to attack a bottle of champagne to drown my sorrows. but instead i think i will just raise a glass to
3. my friends.
